bjhoney
Message 1 of 1
Hi - My therapist just 'floated' the idea that he believes I may have DID. I was hospitalized with major depression recently. Although, I've tried to ignore it for the most part - because that's what everyone around me wants, I was physically and emotionally abused as a youngster. I don't consider myself having been sexually abused but my therapist does - got involved in a church where there was behavior by the pastor that was inappropriate - I guess I just never thought of it as abuse. Finally, the church controlled everything about the lives of members; from who married whom; to where one worked; who was able to attend college; preferences for birth control; shaming people into giving exorbitent amounts of money, etc. Anyhoo - that's a brief synopsis of what happened. How were you diagnosed. I find myself resistant to the diagnosis. I've always talked about myself in the third person, referred to me as 'we'. It was always puzzling to me that I could be so 'on' and when I am 'on' as I call it, I am wonderful - charming, funny, witty, smart, confident, caring - BUT, I live with a gnawing fear of not knowing when or where this overwhelming terrified part of me will emerge, then I can't get out of bed, talk on the phone, I am forgetful, can't understand things when I'm spoken to, I am distracted, I can't even force myself to go to work, to school, I feel so ahhhh...worthless....and I can be quite anxious wondering when this will occur because it is ALWAYS at the most inopportune times. It is very stressful....any thoughts would help. Thanks